NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.
NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE. LIVE.
URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.
<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>
NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN
EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE
PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA
NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA
REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT
PRETEND IT’S 2BYA
NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE.
FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT.
PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.
STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA
NO “MATTER”. EXIST IN THE VOID WITHOUT PURPOSE OR MEANING.
THERE IS NO “YOU”, ONLY THE VAST CONCEPT OF NOTHING.
TIME DOES NOT EXIST.
That’s the best, deepest science lesson I’ve ever had
This is my favorite post on tumblr.
Ah yes, the flute
that’s a trumpet
i’m convinced that’s a piano. Are you all blind or something?
what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?
one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails
I WANT TO GOOGLE A SONG BUT ITS A SOUNDTRACK AND I DONT KNOW THE NAME OR THE MOVIE AND I CANT GOOGLE THE SPECIFIC NOTES I HATE MY LIFE
I AM CRYING THE FUTURE IS NOW
I DIDNT BELIEVE IT WOULD WORK BUT
MOTHER FUCKING SORCERY
I didn’t believe this…so I tried
tumblr has opened to my eyes to so many things
TODAY IS BEST DAY
You always have that one follower who attacks your notifications in the middle of the night and goes through your blog, reblogging everything in sight.
And you’re just like:
one thing girls have real solidarity on is their periods:
- we dont judge someone if they prefer pads or tampons over the other
- we always have extras and we’re always willing to give them to a girl in need
- we teach each other about cramp remedies and how to get out bloodstains
- we do pants checks for each other
"what are you reading?"
"its a…online book."
"oh cool, what’s it about?"
I love that everyone just knows
"what are you writing?"
"oh cool, what’s it about?"
"can i read it?"
Well somebody finally gets it!
Every school should be like mine: four hours a day, three time slots you can attend (morning at 8, afternoon at 12, evening at 5), online classes in case you miss a day, english and math direct instruction, bus stop close by, you can graduate early if you want, you can switch time slots if you need to, and they respect if you have a mental disorder/want to be addressed by a different name or by diff pronouns. You can listen to music, too, and everyone is super chill. Small classes where everyone minds their own business and gets their work done. That is how school should be.
WHAT SCHOOL DO YOU GO TO??
THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST SCHOOL EVER
you may look like a bride but you will never bring your family honor
one day when i try to get a boyfriend this will come back to bite me
I don’t understand how all Muslims are called terrorists because of what one group of 19 extremist men did 13 years ago.
But white people aren’t called terrorists when they invaded their countries, killed millions of civilians, when they shoot up schools, shoot up movie theaters, and kill random POC. Isn’t that something.
Mutant 101 - Professor Xavier Should Put In A Call To Her Parents - 5 Year Old Mia Stares Down marvelentertainment's Cast Of Guardians Of The Galaxy As She Crushes Them In A Game Of GotG Trivia On jimmykimmellive [X]
Vin face: “You got smoked, fake geek boy”
Now I’m wondering how Vin Diesel did against her.
They asked her and Vin what planet Groot came from and she answered before him. This child is my spirit animal.
trans rights are more important than doctor who, supernatural, and sherlock combined.
holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit.
every time I see a post like this I like to imagine that those anon messages are fake because I literally cannot comprehend how someone could be so fucked up to write something like that in all seriousness
Chris Pratt spotted in Hollywood at a local donation center and getting his car washed before he stopped for a grocery store on August 6, 2014